Ten responses to "how did you get like that?"

After telling my good freinds Nichola and Jacqueline the other night about my latest response to this question, I thought I'd post the fabulous top ten that Ouch!, the most fab disability website in the world came up with.

"I angered a magician."

"I could be able-bodied, but I'm just way too lazy."

"My father is also my brother."

"I was born and raised in a laboratory by an evil genetic scientist."

"This is what happens if you spend too much time on your Playstation."

"I was trying to get a kitten down from a tree."

"Sir, you insult me - but thank you for paying attention to me, it means so much."

"Actually there is nothing wrong with me, I'm one of a new emerging species."

"I was a contestant on Cheggers Plays Pop and bounced too high on the inflatable."

"I was Glenn Hoddle in a former life." *

* Now, for those of you who aren't up with the world of soccer, Glen Hoddle was a former captain of the English Football team, who was sacked from his position five years ago for coming out with the cracker line:

“You and I have been physically given two hands and two legs and half-decent brains … some people have not been born like that for a reason. The karma is working from another lifetime. What you sow, you have to reap.”

Oh, so that’s it - Karma! And all this time I thought it was something to do with not eating my greens. Boy, I’m glad Glen set the record straight with that pearl of wisdom!

By the way, my latest response was: "No actually it's a really recent thing. Unfortunate laundry accident. I ended up in the dryer, went through a full cycle and just came out like this. I used to be 6 foot 2. Really."